We are happy to have Anne Calhoun at Smexy today!
From a “fresh and imaginative” (The Romance Studio) voice in erotic romance come the tales of two women, each daring to challenge the toughest of men…but in these edgy, heated encounters, the greatest thing she’ll risk is her heart.
In Over the Edge, after a tragic incident during Ty Hendricks’ last tour of duty he cut off all connection with anyone he cares about—until a night with Lauren Kincaid draws him reluctantly back into the world. Lauren sees a wounded man in danger of losing everything to his inner demons, but the sensual, no-holds-barred fight for Ty’s soul could cost Lauren her heart.
In All on the Line, Abby Simmons fell hard for Lieutenant Sean Winthrop, but he sacrificed their relationship when he deployed to Afghanistan. Now he’s home, full of regrets and intent on winning back the woman he never forgot. Abby gives Sean her body but holds her heart aloof, until one night of pleasure forces her to choose her U.S. Marine…or life without him, forever.
One Writer’s Balancing Act
I want to preface this blog by saying that it’s based solely on my own extreme introvert experience, and doesn’t constitute an advice column or a polemic. Your mileage may vary.
Romance novelists are overwhelmingly women, so when you watch the #1k1hr hashtag on Twitter you see a lot of things like “have to fold laundry then I’m in” or “I’m out…time to pick up the kids” or “got interrupted by a phone call” which might be an editor or agent call, but is more likely a friend calling to chat, the school calling about a sick kid or parent, a sibling who needs to vent or a repair person or a doctor’s office or a…you get the idea. As much as I love my husband, I dread the days he’s off work and “getting stuff done”, because in addition to the titles of Writer, Mother, Wife, I am also Queen of Can You Hold This While I Screw It In and Duchess of Hey Where’s The (insert any standard household object here).
It’s hard to get into book world when there are so many people in your real world who need you, so the most important step I take is to write during the day when the house is empty (late night/early morning works for those with day jobs). The next thing I do is actually much more difficult because my husband has to go to work or we’ll be living in a cardboard box under a bridge, and my son has to go to school. The house somewhat empties itself, but what about the online chatter that seems so compelling?
It’s not. It’s a twenty-first century, first world trigger for a hardwired dopamine/opoid cycle that drives us to seek out new things and obtain satisfaction when we find them, which was important when the “new thing” was a tasty, satisfying meal on the savanna but very problematic when you’re constantly checking your email/Twitter/FB for…what exactly? Shutting down this cycle is the second most important thing I do to balance my life and writing. I get a certain # of family-free hours in a day. I want to spend them wisely because I’m less cranky when I’m pulling the story from my brain at a respectable pace.
So, conduct an experiment. Turn off your phone while you’re working. Also turn off the television, Facebook, Twitter (during the #1k1hr sprint). Oh, hell, let’s just say the internet in general. You might need get the dopamine urge to research the exact appearance of the north end of the Great Lawn in Central Park, but type [put research here] into your manuscript, and stay off the internet (use brackets so you can search on them in your final doc or you end up buying patent leather Dankso clogs from Zappos and sending a book to your editor with [get details about data centers from Mr. C here] in the manuscript, to pick two examples not at random.)
We could frame this as “women claiming something in their lives for themselves” which is true, but I would like to suggest that your total engagement is also what your story needs. I know I’m totally engaged when I reread what I wrote and don’t remember writing it, or when I pick up the second can of Diet Coke I brought upstairs to kick-start my brain and find it half-full because I forgot to pour it into my glass, or when my son scared the bejeezus out of me because I’m so focused I forgot where I was. For me it’s a better day in general if I’ve left it all on the page, not all over Twitter, Facebook, blogs, and shopping sites.
Yes, there are people who can write 5000-6000 words a day while tweeting, reading Yahoo loops, answering calls, cooking dinner, and occupying Wall Street. I’m not one of them (and I’ll say I’m not bitter about it, but remember that I tell stories for a living…). I recently bought Freedom for Mac, a $10 software program that disables your wireless connection for up to eight hours. After using it for two weeks I found I could meet my daily word count goal in half the time I’d needed before!
Writer or not, are you an online addict, or coolly in control of your habits? Tell me for a chance to win UNCOMMON PLEASURE, my current release written with the internet turned off!
Thanks Anne! To be entered to win Uncommon Pleasure, leave a comment below. Open to everyone through March 3.
Hi Anne, the internet can be a big distraction, especially when writing or learning stuff, but it is also helpful when you need to brainstorm a plot idea with your friends.
dannyfiredragon@aol.com
Ha, ha a device that turns off your computer’s Internet connection (Freedom for Mac) so you can work. Love it! How about a device that turns off my Kindle so I don’t spend all my time reading those great books you write Anne. Maybe then I’ll get some of my to do list done, lol. Nah, I’d rather read, so what if kids & hubby come home & there’s no clean clothes and no dinner.
I think I am in control until I look up and 4 hours have gone by!
Congrats to Anne on the upcoming release. I’m not quite an internet addict, but I do spend too much time browsing for things to buy.
Not a writer, but a complete internet addict. Congrats on the release and thanks for the opportunity to win the book.
I’m addicted.
Hi Anne, For me it’s easy to unplug from the world with a good book , Uncommon Pleasure sounds like the perfect Smexy book to curl up with.Thanks Mandi for the fun interview with Anne!
not quite addicted
I am cool with it,congrats on book whoo,
I’m am internet addict, trying to wean myself though. Can’t seem to slow down on the books I read however…
I want!
Unfortunately I’m addicted too… I believe I have control over it, but that’s not true and I honestley can’t imagine a day I’m not checking my mails or looking for something new.
I can be an internet addict sometime. Most days I always have to check my emails at least. Thanks for the chance to win!
I can be addicted to my e-mails. At times I find myself refreshing every couple of minutes to see if I got any new ones. And Twitter is another very very addictive site, you can lose 30-45 minutes in a blink ;-) Thank you for the chance Anne!
thanks for the great post and congrats to Anne on her new release! Book blogs are a terrible weakness for me :) I get most of mine delivered by email so I’m always “up to date” but that means I get about 100 emails a day. I think I spend at least 2 hrs a day going through them all! But in the long run it’s worth it to me b/c I get fun interviews, new book info and “meet” new authors!
I loose hours. Reading Smexy Books emails and then following all the links!
I’m a bit of an addict, but I’m trying to get it under control – it’s cutting into my reading time!
No doubt about it…I’m addicted. :-)
Addict, definitely. Are there actually people out there who aren’t? Who are still alive, I mean? And have access to the Internet? Otherwise, I don’t see how it’s possible…surely no one has that much willpower.
I really should get that turn-off-the-wireless-thingie. Only I’m afraid I’d “accidentally” fall asleep while it was working and “conveniently” wake up when I was connected again. I have a freaky sixth sense like that ;)
I think I am in control but it is addicting. Thanks for the giveaway. Please enter me. Tore923@aol.com
I’m an addict! Follow way too many book blogs! Afraid I’ll miss something if I don’t read every single one. Thanks for the chance.
mlawson17 at hotmail dot com
I’m a teacher and our gradebooks are all online. Many a night I sit down with the intent to put grades in, but check twitter or fb (or the latest book deals!) The next time I surface, to much time had passed and i have to stay up late to update. Sometimes I wish the gradebook wasn’t online, but then I think about sitting at my desk vs my couch, and the couch wins! In short, yes the internet is distracting.
There is no such thing as “just 5 minutes” when it comes to me and the Internet. I keep telling myself and I don’t learn!
The internet can definitely swallow up a lot of time especially when I am should be getting some housework done because it is much more preferable than cleaning the bathroom. But just giving myself some specific time to go on the internet is usually the best way to not lose too much time to it.
I believe that no one is fully in control of their internet habit. Giving yourself a limit doesn’t always work but we try.
It is split. I am somewhat in control, but not totally. Especially when I discover a new time suck, like The Useless Web.
It also brings about a trusting aura that is great for
flirting. There was unquestionably no question in my head that Nexus Pheromones fulfilled
its promise. The twin with the cologne gained nearly
two times the number of interest as compared to the one not having phermones.